Monday, July 21, 2008

Daughters

I wax nostalgic.

With every child born, there comes into my life a wonder, a love, a joy that knows no bounds. Sons, daughters, grandchildren, all bringing more into a heart that seemed full already.

With apologies to Darris, Doug, and now Ben, Xander and Kroten, I must share tender feelings for the special place in a father's heart for daughters. Not that I love you less, just different.

Last night I went to a Celebration of Life for a man, Daniel, who's untimely passing leaves two beautiful young women, his daughters Courtney and Lisa. As I watched them, I could not hold back thoughts of the three sweet spirits who have graced our home over the past many years, which seem like so few. I think of --

Little fingers wrapped around mine,
Soft, pink dresses,
Giggles, sometimes incessant,
Sleep-overs,
Slips and Falls,
Wearing Daddies Shoes,
Excruciating trips to ERs,
(girls shouldn't be allowed to get hurt)
Braces,
Whispers about boys,
Embarassed pride of approaching womanhood,
Camp (tents and tarps)
Dances,
Dates,
Proms,
Hopes,
Dreams,
Beaming faces,
Tears,
Drama,
More Tears,
Tender questions,
Testimony,
Blessings,
Aches over lost friends,
(Daddy can't stop the hurt,
he would, if he could)
Daddies Tears,
Choices,
Growth,
A butterfly emerging,
And then, in an instant, a young man comes into their life, and Daddy's little girl belongs to another. He says he loves her. He says he wants to be with her forever. "No! Go Away!" But instead, "Please take care of her. Please be there for her. Please accept her as she is."
I endure, praying that this young man is one of integrity, one of character, one who will hold this precious spirit in the highest regard. Hopes that this young man will cherish her, worship her, and honor her as one who carries a spark of divinity and special partnership with her Father in Heaven. I cannot choose for her. I can only hope, and continue to pray for her.
And then she is gone. Close as a phone call, or a too short visit. I long for the little finger wrapped around mine, a whispered secret, a shared moment of discovery, a tender hug and caress. You will always be my little girl. I love you!

2 comments:

Kristen Moss said...

... and you'll always be my daddy.

Deidra Smith said...

I've been checking out everybody's blogs that I've been able to find since the reunion and been having a lot of fun doing it, but wow! That is one emotional post. What sweet things to say about your girls :) They've got to feel pretty lucky to have such a great dad.
It was fun seeing you at the reunion. And I'm excited about all of these blogs, maybe I can keep track of everyone a little better with them.